25 bucks a day & 5.5 Weeks of Sober

25 bucks a day has been an initiative I have been trying dearly to stick by for about 2 months. Essentially the rules are quite rudimentary - After rent / cell phone / internet expenses- I attempt to hold daily expenses to 25 dollars.

It's proven a little difficult, but for the most part, excluding traveling expenses, I've pretty much towed the line. The major challenges I've found are late night eating, and the lack of judgement when inebriated, or when you have forgotten to plan for an outing and douchebags charge you $8 bucks for a hotdog. I've definitely lapsed many a times, but I think I have had 5 or 6 weeks within the budgeting constraints, and because of it I've been able to put a bunch of my cash into RRSP's.

My best tips into keeping this feasible are the following.

1.) Spend less than $5 for every weekday lunch
Make sammies, go to the grocery store, pack leftovers, or steal from Brad's lunchbox.(If you don't know Brad meet him and commence mooching)

2.) Cook Food In mass for future meals
Pasta, Stews, and anything in a pot can be delicious - even a few days later. The freezer is also your friend.

3.) Water bottles are the new cool
For water and other recreational beverages it's a key player. Flasks and gatorade energy drink mixes are equally ridiculous.

4.) Brunch is the greatest meal to eat out
Eat like a king for like 15 bucks. Grease, ketchup, and mimosas. Need I say more?

5.) Don't be an introverted idiot.
Save up 80 bucks every week for hilarity on the town each weekend. If you save it - you'll party 19 times as hard.

6.) God gave you 2 feet.
Don't taxi unless a cop tells you that you must. Metros (subways) are also hilariously cheap and amazing for people watching.

There are some things that I miss, and in all honesty I will be buying many of these items this weekend. After 2 months I just can't live without them. Notably: Dry Cleaning, Steak, New shoes, Shaving Materials (that don't cut my face), Fancy Hair Goop, and Oven Mitts.

Since my last posts I have returned to drinking of alcohol after a good 45 day period of cleansing. It was an eye opening experience, and I don't regret partaking in the spell of sobriety, nor stopping the cleanse itself. Going to a bar sober definitely has taught me a few observational lessons, and my liver continues to write me thank you notes for giving it some alone time. It's also brought to my forefront how alcohol dependent our world has really become. I was never an alcoholic or anything, for those who were concerned - ahem family, but I do think that moderation is probably the lesson learned out of all of this. Everything but some crazy examples are never horrible in moderation.

I do have to admit that drinking a relaxing glass of wine with friends or family was probably the one thing I missed most.

awesome

Sobriety Is The New Cool.

I've given some pretty deep thought to this post, and for several weeks I have been toying with what I am about to write. Mainly due to the fact that if I were to proclaim something in this type of forum and not go through with it I might look like a douche. Or even worse that my word would lose legitimacy.

Today I have given up drinking alcoholic beverages for the next month cold turkey, and it is my goal to stop for the rest of 2009, and perhaps a longer period of time. 

Now I understand that this is a pretty drastic change, as I have been quite a shit show in my day, but I have my reasons: health concerns, budgetary realizations, and general stupid and clouted decision making. In all honesty my main push for this initiative is because I feel that my life is speeding by far too quickly. I am trying to remind myself that I only have one shot at this, and that I should be maximizing every breathe of it. I think that for me, at least, alcoholism is one of the things in my life that is compromising my efficiency, and overall life productivity.

So to my friends - please understand that I can be equally offending and hilarious without booze, and that this is kind of my way of resetting some very important defaults in my life.

To my haters a.k.a doubters - I will not fail, and I will take this seriously. This is going to be 6 months of fun, and true realization of what I can do with what I have. Please respect that I am doing this for me, and that it may be just be a small combination of acts. Although someone famous once said - "I wish to do something great and wonderful. But i must start by doing the little things like they were great and wonderful. " So hear goes with the first step.

The Perfect Summer Salad

All right..... So this is a little unorthodox post for me, but I am about to share the recipe for one of the greatest things I have ever made. It's a little odd because I hardly cook, and what I do cook I usually eat myself without any scrutiny- regardless of the level of edibility. But I have stumbled upon what I believe is a gem, and it only took me three attempts to perfect. Here goes nothing.

The Perfect Summer Salad

One Tomato (Diced)

One Royal Gala Apple (Diced)

One Yellow Pepper (Diced)

Small Cup of Chick Peas (Pre-marinated in Oil and vinegar dill salad dressing)

10 Field Mushrooms (Thinly Sliced)

Half of a Celery Stalk (Diced)

Quarter of a Red Onion (Hash)

3 Eggs Scrambled - (Cooked with milk to keep fluffy - Salted & Cooled)

1 Packet of Mozzarella Cheese Curds (Chopped into smaller chunks)

A dash of Parmesan Cheese

The Salad Base includes the following:

Romaine lettuce

Endive

Shaved Carrots

Radicchio

Simply mix all the ingredients together and dress and toss appropriately.

Best dressed with a Sweet Onion Vinaigrette

I think it's an awesome summer salad. I hope you like it!

Lessons Learned Whilst Creating The Perfect Salad:

Unripened Cheddar Cheese is the worst invention ever. It tastes and smells like toe jam. This product is dairies cruel joke on humanity.

Fruity salad dressings like 'Raspberry Balsamic' leave you wondering why you poured an oily smoothie onto your salad. Don't make the same low fat summery mistake - use a real dressing. Even good old 'Oil & Vinegar' is a suitable alternate.

Don't put hot scrambled eggs onto a salad. It makes everything squishy and gross. It made me think of a sailor eating a slimy packaged salad in a mess hall in the middle of the Atlantic.

That I am an idiot for ever putting hot scrambled eggs onto a salad of any kind.

life is good

I woke this afternoon to a voice. It sounded foreign, raspy, and deep resounding through me. It was almost James Earl Jones-esque from 'Field of Dreams' with a british twang. At first I was unsure if I was still dreaming, or if I was just having a post nap groggy patch. But what I am sure about is that something spoke to me. And one line came across pretty clearly... - "Head up. You only have one shot at this kid...."

Now I can spend years debating why that message was conveyed, or more freakishly who or what was conveying it. But right now (at least) I prefer to not dissect the medium.  The one thing that has continued to resound with me is that - I have never before in my life needed to hear something so badly.

With drool still in the corners of my mouth this message threw me into a spiral of thought. It re-emphasized that I again was wasting life complaining about the controllables. Bitching about things that I simply could improve if I sat down and listened to myself, and implemented a solution. I can change what I eat for breakfast, where I work, whom I love, or what toothpaste I do so decide to use. I can modify my appearance, and determine whom I confide in - This is all in my locus of control.

So I guess there is one important follow up - and surprise surprise - it's simple. There are things that I can't control. But it's more-so the realization that this is normal. That I'm not the only one who has to submit. We are all in the same boat about the weather, our mortality, or the fact that we all have emotions. This will not change.

By recommitting to the compartmentalizing of my life I have made abundantly clear what I should see as things to solve, and what I need to accept. This has kind of cleared up a few things for me, and lifted a huge anvil of stress off of my shoulders. Hopefully this will allow me to keep my head up and focus on this one shot.

Utter wackness - when asleep & awake

Do the things we dream about mean anything?

I dreamt this week that I was a gigantic plastic piece in an enormous board game. Somehow I had transformed into a bright red "Sorry" place holder, and this invisible force came down from above and slid me from place to place. But it was more so taking me from one time in my life to another - from one scenario to the next almost showing me what I had experienced in my life - Childhood, Teenage Years, Professional Life. I woke up wondering if I had eaten some bad chinese, and then I stumbled around may apartment looking for some meaning. This was some some crazy imagery, I know, but this is my subconscious we are talking about. I am reasonably used to hilarity - but not complete wackness. The best I could come up with is that I ( a.k.a my subconscious) somehow decided to show myself (me) my experiences from a different perspective - in my dreams. That was actually exhausting to explain.

So anyway -  this personal tangent about life proposes itself after I survived a week of struggle and extremes. From insect infestation, to utmost fatigue from excessive antibiotics and cleaning, to all the way to remembering what it feels like to overcome some horrific challenge. Then just to add some fun life throws in the mix the gutting sensation of truly longing for someone who you really haven't had the opportunity to understand .......

So did this trying week happen for a reason? Did this resolution have some sort of meaning that I might have been impacted by? In my dreams probably - but it's only Monday.

Subway Quirks

On typical weekdays I take the Montréal métro (subway) to and from work. It's a short journey, about 7 minutes / 4 stops, but I try to make it as interesting for myself as possible. I must admit that there are two quirky games that have made their way into my daily routine.

1.) I'll admit it --- I stare, desperately trying to figure out what people are thinking. I ogle, I pretend not to look, then glance again. I usually find myself evaluating the oddest looking characters available. Deliberating about where my subject of choice has come from, and attempting to pin point the angst and troubles that I envision they are harboring. Possible traits that may qualify you as a target? An overly wrinkled forehead, a tattered pair of trousers, a heinous smell that one struggles to define. All of which send me on fatuous tangents trying to give reasoning to why things are they way they are. I do my best to imagine my subjects childhood, their family problems, or simply their last meal.

I figure that all this is reasonably normal, as any inquisitive mind would ponder from time to time. The most diabolic thing is that I tend to force myself to believe that my perceptions of these strangers are remotely accurate. I then spend a second or two snapping out of the moment - as to reassure myself that it was my extensive imagination at work.

2.) When I reach my morning destination, one of the major hubs in the downtown core, an electronic whistling sound chimes, and the subway doors slide open. I push through the small melee of impatient people trying to embark, and I slow my stride. 

At this moment everyone who is moving towards me has a look of panic, as they awkwardly gush towards the trains open portholes from the nearby stairwells. I chuckle to myself as I view grandmothers keep pace with drug dealers, and tots being dragged unwillingly by their baby sitters as they dash to the global goal - the subway. The imagery is just too epic, and the emotions too visible. Most give up several strides before the doors close and slump their shoulders in frustration.

But there is always what i call the "College Try Sprinter". The CTS is special, and there is always at least one per boarding. No matter how slim the window of opportunity appears, CTS' will relentlessly scamper at their top speed (as if he or she were running the 40 yard dash) towards the closing entrances. The great part about the CTS is that they are extreme. Side shuffling, on-comer juking, and brief case under the arm placements are commonly utilized maneuvers.  Small celebrations are infrequently seen aboard the train post success - the occasional fist pump or a teethy grin. But CTS' actions of disappointment are more rewarding for the onlooker - the punching of the trains exterior itself, flailing of limbs in dismay, or the less original uttering of curses in front of the general public.

Who knows how I will entertain myself when biking to work in the summer.

Miklos Feher - Who?

Here is the story.

Miklos Feher was a professional soccer player. Hungarian born, he was a right footed striker who played internationally in World Cup, and UEFA Cup qualifiers. He was tall, with arian features, shoulder length hair, and a muscly frame.

Here's where the tale takes a nasty spin. In 2004 Miklos was playing in a match in Guimaråes in northern Portugal for a pro club team, S.L. Benfica. Minutes after being substituted onto the pitch he received a yellow card for a questionable tackle. Seconds afterwards with all of the cameras intently recording his reaction to the penalty - he collapsed, had a massive heart attack, and went into cardiac arrest.

The most unimaginable thing about this story is that the game was being broadcasted live without a delay on a major European sports station. Thousands of viewers simply couldn't pull themselves away from television screens as they watched the tragedy unfold. They watched as Miklos' teammates and stadium medical staff attempted to revive his lifeless body. They cringed as the realization occurred that CPR was necessary, and they starred even more closely when the doctors stopped the compressions near the sidelines.

Millions were forced to deal with death in such a first hand state in real time. Forced to grieve, forced to contemplate, and forced to explain to loved ones what had happened.

So here is the deeper question ... Is our society so calloused that this is what it takes for us to be touched? Do we need to watch something horrific with blinkers on before we can take note of the how precious life is? In many ways our societies' screens shelter us from what is real. It hides us from poverty, from malnutrition, and from real trepidation. Somehow in the daily news one aging actresses skiing accident overshadows hundreds of killings in Kashmir. Often from the truth we can become squeamish, and we as people might be forced to feel, and then reflect.

So the real question is if the game had not have been televised would the impact of Miklos' death been as severe? Most likely not. Would his jersey had been retired? Yes. Would you have read this article and learned of his story? I am willing to say confidently no.

Are drastic celebrity tragedies like this the only way that our society can rediscover its humanity? Maybe you should judge for yourself. Here is the link:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwRKwObXEOs&feature=related

Taking Stress in Stride

Saturday - It's about time.

I came very close to sitting down and writing a blurb about how stressful my world was, and how obtuse my day to day had become. Then I went outside and ran. I ran without any direction, or destination - not in a Forrest Gump-esque way - just for a morning adventure. But with each step it started to shed the pent up frustrations, closeted angst, and irritations stride by stride.

So here is what I think helped me get rid of these feeling. The simple understanding that stress is universal. It's everywhere. It's in your now, it was in your past, and it's going to be in your future.  So, If these "stressors" are always going to be there - the first step must be to work on getting this understood. Seems simple right?

There is a line from some girly acoustic song "let's try to stop taking life so seriously" that blasted through my iPod mid-sweat this morning. What I really I think that I needed to hear is "Let's try to take the stress less seriously" I am thinking this because it's the reaction to stress that causes negativity right? As we have already declared that stress is a constant. The pending reaction is actually the variable that we can change. Here's my advice:  take reacting to the inevitable stress in stride. Don't let stress sneak up on you. Expect it. Live with it. Maybe even learn to embrace it.

(Or maybe it was just the need for some physical activity, and fresh air...)

 

First Attempt. Malapropos, and Venting

So here goes. "The first blog" a.k.a. my eager attempt at sharing my innermost feelings with a select few whom I blatantly inform that this exists.

Life is, well, heavy at the moment. Or at least the entire world around me seems to be hellbent on treating it as such. Occasionally I wonder if this epidemic is making my life pass by at a faster rate, or if it is feeding some sort of negativity. Both points are continually being debated.

In any case I feel blessed, and on the last day of winter. I definitely don't feel like I'm in a bad place. Who knows what is around the corner.....? 

I think my plan for the next little while is to live full. We'll see how it plays out.