Summer of 2000 Anthem

My city's still breathing (but barely it's true)
through buildings gone missing like teeth.
The sidewalks are watching me think about you,
sparkled with broken glass.
I'm back with scars to show.
Back with the streets I know
Will never take me anywhere but here.
The stain in the carpet, this drink in my hand,
the strangers whose faces I know.
We meet here for our dress-rehearsal to say "I wanted it this way"
Wait for the year to drown.
Spring forward, fall back down.
I'm trying not to wonder where you are.
All this time lingers, undefined.
Someone choose who's left and who's leaving.
Memory will rust and erode into lists of all that you gave me:
a blanket, some matches, this pain in my chest,
the best parts of Lonely, duct-tape and soldered wires,
new words for old desires,
and every birthday card I threw away.
I wait in 4/4 time,
Count yellow highway lines that you're relying on to lead you home.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IgJ6soX18R8

Insomnia Inspired

On the cusp of saying something charming,

Moments before appearing as brave.

Awaiting another shining moment,

Whilst attempting to behave.

The world smiles for all who take the time to realize that they are being smiled upon.

Poetically Incorrect

Poetically Incorrect

I worry constantly about my bank balance, and yet I sneer at those who feed their families by making change.

I eerily stare at the homeless, and spend countless hours decorating to ensure my feeling of homeliness.

I owe nothing, though I have it etched in my conscience that the world owes me more opportunity, more options, and more attention. I am gravely disappointed when my self conceived expectations are neglected.

I fail to see the plan, and then afterwards I assure myself that I did not plan to fail.

I listen to the comments that I wish to hear - the compliments, the one liners - with full attention. I over-talk or tune out utterances that bore me, or those that I feel are less pertinent to my current situation.

I wander when I feel the need. Occasionally, I hurt those who deeply love me.

I play the hypocrite, the devils advocate, and the yes man where I see fit.

I believe that I am original, and singular. But reality shows that most of my actions are non-linear.

I expect too much of myself, and those around me. I recognize that I must realize needed change - before changing my station.

Or maybe I need to simply adjust my settings.

All of this is possible as I am still the holder of my remote.

5 things that have stuck

1 - Say what you feel without regret. "Those who mind don't matter, those who matter don't mind." Dr. S.

2 - People can, and will be obnoxious. This is a sad fact. Don't try to change it - deal with it.

3 - Nothing is truly amazing - if you have no one to share it with.

4 - "Everyone likes someone who gets to the point quickly." David R.

5 - There will always be another green light.

"Material development only brings us physical comfort........."

We all like stuff.

The latest and greatest sweater, the new and improved ergonomic kitchen whisk, or a new flavor of lavender bath salt. (wow these examples are incredibly random)

The one thing I feel we all need to remember this holiday season is that our economy is run by brilliantly implemented push/pull strategies.

The North American market is covertly and continually 'pushing' us to purchase crap that we don't need. Think about how you feel it to be necessary to buy the improved version of a cell phone, or the larger plasma, or ahem excuse me, the LED tv. We don't require these items for existence, but we feel the internal desire to go out and purchase them because the market has told us, reiterated, and then told us again that we can't survive or be sociable without them. We fall for the bait because we strive for acceptance and short term physical comfort.

Companies pitch new products to be sure that it is understood that clients simply can't imagine being 'established' without them. Take for example - Apple's iPhone 4.0. The pitch included many features that had been amalgamated into one expensively elegant device. Convenient? Yes. Necessary? No. The product was directly pushed onto millions of customers with the main selling feature, social acceptance, in the forefront. This acceptance status and the physical comfort is short term - as there is always a new model in the pipeline.

The economy also churns by utilizing nicely played out pull strategies. A good example of a pull was utilized during a promotional campaign for pre-school toys and educational products. Marketers flooded children's programs with product placements and adverts on multiple children's shows on the BBC.

The marketing team originally placed the items - showing children playing with the action toys or learning tools in brief product introductions. The adverts then moved into a full swing 'buy now or miss out on your childhood' psychological messages that captured millions of children. This then forced parents to shell out over 90 million pounds in the 2002 holiday season to appease their little ones wants.

One may argue that we aren't as susceptible as children - but look at how Christmas, Valentine's Day, and other holidays have been implemented to push sales of unneeded products.

It has truly been a beautiful scheme that we all play into swimmingly. Maybe we can at least take a step back this year, and be aware of what is taking place.

The title of this entry is a DalaiLama quote, but it ends with a bit of a twist - "Material development only brings us physical comfort; mental development depends on training the mind. "

Maybe we all should be focussing on training our minds instead of the next 'necessary' purchase.

PONDERINGS.... Just sometimes

life throws your curve-balls, and leads you into spirals. Each with their own consequences, and ramifications. Some that one just can't control, but most that one can manage, or wade through.

As great as this life is - there are moments, and things that we wish we could change, imperfections that we long to modify. Most frequently it's the continual desire to change those around us, and change qualities in others to be more like our own selves.

But rarely is the sight on the pistol of change targeted on ourselves. Because it's easier to judge variables that don't touch our inner-selves or, better yet, share the same airspace - and why should we even worry about perforating our soft and cushy feelings ? ..... potentially self improvement? "Why take the risk." we mutter.

It's these choices, and situations that all of us wish that we could relive on that rare Monday evening, and - as mentioned above - it's these moments that we pray that we could erase or eliminate completely.

Hopefully at some point we remember, embrace, and carry them along with us. Often though, we wipe them in an effort to completely overlook our weak, and vulnerable moments. This denial is comforting as it keeps us focussed walking onward without guilt, nor worry. The silly thing is that later on we will eventually awake from the haze. Realizing that we have walked the same road, toed the same line, or sang the same chorus multiple times.

So what am I thankful for this thanksgiving? My ability to call myself out about my own shit. In an attempt to rip the scabs from the flesh, in an effort to cleanse the wound permanently. Knowingly not in an effort to hide the scars, but rather to embrace the fact that that I have fully healed.

Best Purchase of 2010

Simply put - it's my feather bed.

A feather bed is an add on to the normal bed. Essentially it's an additional layer of comfortable awesomeness that you add on top of your already amazing mattress. It offers a sinking sensation when one settles down, and it drops me into the deepest sleep imaginable. I shift less, and my shoulders don't hurt in the morning if I do fall asleep in the fetal position.

So.... when you are shopping don't fall for the industries tricks. Go direct to the manufacturer, and save about 40% on the total price. Also this will most likely be the first time in your life that NAFTA does anything for you. You will not pay one cent of taxes because a luxury item can, apparently, only be made in California, and can be sent anywhere in North America in about 5 business days.

If you happen to stay at a boutique hotel - Sofitel, Peninsula, Crowne, De Crillion you can try one out for a night and you will understand how this will change your life. Sleep in a hotel bed every night of your life. A good nights sleep is worth a dollar or two a night no? Why not save up and make each morning feel like you actually got some good rest.

Check out this site to buy directly from the source - https://www.pacificcoast.com